Flutter
by Skandar-Loves-Redvines
Summary: A cute, fluffy, and hopefully humorous oneshot starring one of the most oblivious couples in the Harry Potter series… Ron and Hermione! Includes HG/RW, GW/HP, DM/AG.


**Disclaimer – Absolutely nothing...  
**_**A/N – I'M BACK IN AMERICA!!! Sorry, I had to get that off my chest… Anyway, I am back in the US of A now. I got back on Sunday a few weeks ago (8/2/09) at 5 am. The plane ride from Mumbai to New Jersey was 18 hours long. My butt was cramping by the time I got off. But, you, my (totally awesome) readers probably don't want to know about my sore rear end, so I'll just get on with the story now… Enjoyyy!!!**_**  
****Summary: A cute, fluffy, and hopefully humorous oneshot starring one of the most oblivious couples in the Harry Potter series… Ron and Hermione! Includes HG/RW, GW/HP, DM/AG.**

***

Flutter  
_By Drishti Choudhury_  
***

Hermione hopped cautiously over a large mound of fallen stone, wielding her wand in front of her. When everybody had been choosing which parts of Hogwarts they wanted to help mend, Hermione had been in the loo, therefore ending up with the job nobody wanted – cleaning up the Forbidden Forest.

"Bloody hell!" she swore, as her robes caught onto a branch for what seemed like the hundredth time. "Bloody forest and its bloody trees with their bloody branches!"

"Now, now, now, Miss Hermione I-Never-Use-Bad-Words Granger," said a voice from behind her. "What would your parents say if they heard you using such obscenities?" Hermione narrowed her eyes. She knew that voice.

"You're one to talk, Mr. Ron I-Can't-Say-More-Than-Two-Sentences-Without-Swearing Weasley," she retorted. "Why are you even in here? I thought you and Malfoy were helping Professor McGonagall with the Boggarts?"

"Hermione, it's lunchtime," said Ron, stepping over some animal droppings. "You've been in here for three hours. What've you been doing in here anyway?"

"Trying not to die," she answered truthfully. For the last, apparently three hours, she had dodged arrows from annoyed centaurs, battled a few vines of leftover Devil's Snare, and tried to explain to a very tearful Hagrid that he could not keep a young Chimaera found teething on the edge of his cabin.

"Well, anyway, we should go now," said Ron, rubbing the back of his head. "Harry and Ginny are waiting for us outside. They said they would wait while I came and found you. I reckon they just wanted a good snog in private." Hermione laughed. It seemed like the exact thing Ginny would do.

"Wanna bet?" she asked, checking her pockets for any remaining money. "Five Galleons they were _intending_ to snog, but didn't."

"I'll take you up on that," said Ron, fishing in his own pockets for the money. "I caught them eating each other's faces off when I was going Boggart-hunting with Malfoy."

"How did that go, by the way?" asked Hermione, wading through a deep pool of mud.

"Walking in on my sister and my best mate kissing?" asked Ron, with a puzzled look on his face. "Well I've gotten a bit more used to it, but I suppose-"

"No, not Harry and Ginny, you and Malfoy," said Hermione impatiently, cutting Ron off mid-sentence.

"Well, I didn't get all chummy with him-," said Ron, leaping over a fallen tree.

"I didn't expect you to," said Hermione softly.

"-but we were civil to each other," he finished. "I mean we didn't really talk much, but we weren't hexing each other every five minutes either. We both sort of kept to ourselves. I think he slipped off with that Ravenclaw fifth year about halfway through, though. What's her name? Er, Astoria? Yeah, Astoria Greengrass. I think they're dating."

"Yeah, they are. Ginny and I saw them snogging when we were looking for Harry this morning," said Hermione, pulling a twig from her hair.

"They aren't the only ones," muttered Ron. "Hey, did you hear? Charlie found a girlfriend."

"Really?" asked Hermione. "Who?"

"Gwenog Jones, captain of the Holyhead Harpies," said Ron triumphantly. "She visited last week to ask Ginny if she wanted to join the team, and she and Charlie got all chummy together. Harry and I caught them eating each other's faces off about half an hour later. We went looking for them when they didn't return," he added, catching Hermione's disapproving look.

"Isn't that Ginny right over there?" asked Hermione, pointing to a small clearing to their left.

"Merlin, are we here already?" asked Ron, looking to where he could clearly see a patch of fiery red hair. "Is Harry with her?"

"Yeah," said Hermione, "but they aren't snogging. Five Galleons from you then." Ron reluctantly reached into the pocket of his robes, pulling out five shiny gold Galleons.

"Maybe I should've stuck with Divination after all," she smirked, taking the money and putting into her own pocket.

"You must have cheated somehow," complained Ron. "You saw them before we made the bet, didn't you?"

"Oi! Ginny!" called Hermione, completely ignoring Ron's protests. "Over here!" Ginny whipped around, seeing her brother and his best friend walking towards them.

"Hey. We were getting worried about you. Mum dragged Harry off to lunch already. She said he, I quote, "needed some good fattening after the terrible ordeal he's been through." Total balderdash in my opinion," she said, shaking her head. "I think she just wanted to feed somebody. Anyway, we'd better get going. At the rate most of us have been working, there won't be much food left in a bit."

Smiling, the three walked into the castle together, heading for the newly rebuilt Great Hall. Up ahead, Lavender Brown and Padma Patil were setting up some rugs. They seemed to be arguing over which color scheme to use.

"The blue and bronze definitely looks better against the stone," said Padma firmly, holding up two bits of cloth, one a deep midnight blue, the other a shiny bronze.

"The red and gold obviously matches the best with the stone," argued Lavender, also holding up two fabrics, except fiery red and glimmering gold.

"This is coming from the girl whose name look so _wonderful_ together," said Padma sarcastically. "Lavender and brown? That's almost as bad as red and gold!"

"Er, guys?" asked Hermione timidly. "It's just a rug. And you're both choosing your own house colors anyway."

"Well, what do _you_ suggest, then?" asked Padma impatiently, hands on her hips.

"Er, gold and bronze?"

"_Hermione!_ This is _serious_!"

"Well, _sorry_. Next time I won't try to wrap my miniscule mind around such trivial affairs as interior decorating," snapped Hermione.

"They do have a point," mused Ron. "Have you tried the gold and the blue?" Lavender held out the gold fabric, while Padma placed the blue beside it.

"It looks amazing!" cried Padma.

"Just what we were looking for!" said Lavender. She leaned over and gave Ron a quick peck on the cheek. "Thanks Ron!"

Hermione cleared her throat loudly, as Ron backed away, blushing furiously.

"So, why don't we get down to the lunch, then?" asked Ginny. "We wouldn't want to miss out on the food, would we?"

"Right, lunch," mumbled Ron, his face glowing a cherry red. "Food… Hungry…"

Ginny grabbed Ron and Hermione's hands, dragging them into the Great Hall.

"What was that all about?" hissed Hermione.

"Yeah, Ronniekins? When did you become an interior decorator?" asked Ginny, grinning. Ron blushed again.

"I used to help Mum pick out curtains when we were younger," he said, looking down.

"That was _you_ who put the pink curtains in my room?" asked Ginny. "I _hate_ pink! You prat!"

"Actually Mum picked those out, I chose the pink paint for the walls," said Ron, clearly enjoying his sister's displeasure.

"I don't understand what was wrong with the gold and bronze," said Hermione, interrupting the siblings' bickering.

"You really have _no clue_ why gold and bronze look horrible together?" asked Ron. "I mean, they're practically the same color! Now, blue and gold? _That_ is a work of art."

"And while I think my _git of a brother_ is being extremely irritating, I have to agree," said Ginny, glaring at Ron, who was on a roll, talking about the best color schemes to use.

"Whatever," said Hermione irritably, walking over to where she could see Mrs. Weasley trying to force food into Harry's mouth.

"Honestly, Mrs. Weasley," she could hear him saying. "I'm really not that hungry. I've already had three helpings. And shouldn't we wait for Ron, Hermione, and Ginny?"

"It's fine," said Mrs. Weasley, eyeing the plate Harry was now pushing away. "I really do think you need to eat more. You can't have been eating five-course meals while searching for _V-Voldemort_, now could you?"

"I'm fine, Mrs. Weasley," he protested. "Really. Besides, you already given me a feast each meal of the day. I'm sure _one_ meal with only three helpings will last me until dinner. I'm stuffed, I swear to Merlin."

"Harry!" Hermione said, deciding to relieve him of Mrs. Weasley. "Over here!" Harry stood up thankfully, rushing over to where Hermione stood.

"Ugh, she's been driving me _mad_," he muttered. "I love her and all, I mean, she's like the mum I never had, but I _can't eat anymore_. I think I've gained a few stones!" Hermione laughed.

"It can't be _that_ bad," she said. "Oi! Ron! Ginny! Come on! I'm starving!" she called, gesturing towards the table where Mrs. Weasley was sitting. The two, who had been involved in yet _another_ heated argument.

"I swear, they argue as if they're married," she said, shaking her head.

"We do _not_," said Ginny indignantly, having just walked up to her.

"Yes you do," interjected Harry. "If you weren't related, I'd say you _were_ married." Ginny gave him such a fierce glare, he backed away slightly.

"You're lucky I love you, or you'd never be able to have children," she said threateningly.

"Oh, come on," said Harry. "I defeated _Voldemort_. I think I can take you."

"Wanna bet?" she asked, whipping out her wand.

"I was just joking, Ginny," Harry gulped. "I would've thought you knew that, my _sweet, adorable, forgiving girlfriend_?"

"Nice save, O _Brave _Saviour of the Wizarding World," she said sarcastically, stowing her wand back in her sleeve.

"I don't know about you guys," said Hermione, "but I'm going to-"

-insert loud "THUNK" noise here-

And it all went black…

***

Hermione awoke hours later, a terrible ache forming in her head.

_"Where the hell am I?"_ she wondered. She opened her eyes just a crack, to see Ron, Ginny, and Harry sitting beside her. It looked like she was in the Hospital Wing.

_"Crap, did something heavy fall on my head? I feel like someone from a Muggle cartoon, like I just had a piano fall on me," _she thought. _"Wait, if I'm in the Hospital Wing, that means this is meant to be the time when my eyelids flutter open, and I ask in a really weak voice where I am. Then everybody rushes to my bedside. That's what all the clichéd Muggle movies do. How the hell do you make your eyelids flutter? They should teach us things like this, rather than Divination and what not. Well, here goes…"_

She opened her eyes slowly, trying her best to let her eyelids flutter. It must have worked, she thought, as Ron had leapt up from his seat and was staring at her with a worried face.

"Mum!" he cried. "Mum! Her eyelids are spazzing! Is something wrong with her? Merlin's bloody beard!"

_"What the hell?" _she thought. "_Spazzing?"_

"Ronald Bilius Weasley!" she cried, sitting up. "I am not _spazzing_! My eyelids were- Oh wait!" She put on her best impression of a sick, weak person, mumbling, "Where am I? What happened? Oh, my head!"

"Mum!" shouted Ron again, sounding even more worried than before. "She's choking, Mum! Where's Madame Pomfrey? She's choking on something!"

"I give up!" Hermione cried. "My eyelids aren't spazzing, and I'm not bloody _choking_! My eyes were supposed to flutter open, and my voice was meant to sound weak and pitiful! What in the name of Merlin is _wrong_ with you?"

"Hermione, I know you're incredibly annoyed right now," said Harry calmly, standing up as well. "But I'm gonna have to agree with Ron, here. You're eyelids looked like somebody was raising and dropping them with an invisible hand."

"And your voice sounded like the egg Harry had as the second clue during the Triwizard Tournament. Remember how awful its wails sounded? You were like a softer version of that," said Ginny from her seat, barely trying to sound sympathetic.

"Argh!" she cried. "What fell on me anyway?" she demanded.

"A chandelier," said Ron immediately.

"A bloody chandelier fell on me?" asked Hermione. "How is it that I don't have a bloody massive headache right now?"

"Apparently, Ginny's quite good at brewing Headache Potions," said Harry, glancing at Ginny, who blushed.

"It was no big deal," she said modestly. "Madame Pomfrey taught me in my fifth year when I took my OWL's. I used to get headaches from all the studying."

"How the hell did a chandelier manage to fall on me?" asked Hermione, rubbing her slightly sore, bandaged head. "Since when did Hogwarts have bloody chandeliers?"  
"Professor Flitwick was putting one up," answered Harry. "He thought it would make a nice change from having only candles to light up the room. Now we have candles _and_ chandeliers."

"Why d'you keep swearing so much today?" asked Ron suddenly.

"I always swear, just not aloud," Hermione explained, swinging out of bed.

"Where are you going?" asked Ron.

"I'm going back out to help. I still haven't finished with the Forbidden Forest," she said, grabbing her wand from the bedside table. "Besides, I still haven't eaten."

"We'll get your food," said Ginny, practically leaping up from her seat. "You stay here with… Ron!"

"Why me?" whined Ron, crossing his arms defiantly.

"Do you not want to spend time with me?" asked Hermione, raising an eyebrow, mirroring Ron's actions, and crossing her arms. "Is there something _wrong_ with me?"

"No, no, no," said Ron hurriedly. "I just meant that… my …legs needed a stretch?" he finished awkwardly.

"Your _legs needed a stretch_?" asked Hermione critically, eyeing him up and down. "Right then," she said abruptly, turning to Ginny and Harry, both who looked amused. "You two go and get me something to eat. I want to have a little chat with this idiot." She gestured impatiently towards Ron, who was now fearfully backing away.

"Got it," said Ginny cheerfully, grabbing Harry by the arm. "Let's go, Harry! Ron, we'll see you in about twenty minutes… _if you're still alive at the end_. Bye!" She dragged Harry out of the room, a grin plastered on her face.

Hermione rounded on Ron. "What the hell?" she demanded.

"What?" asked Ron offhandly.

"Your legs needed a stretch? You hate spending time with me so bloody much, that you make up excuses like _your legs needed a stretch_?"

"I don't hate spending time with you," answered Ron sulkily. "My legs were cramping, and I wanted to move around a bit in case they fell asleep."

"Oh, sure," said Hermione sarcastically. "I'm sure you just _love_ spending time with – _oomph_!"

Ron had planted his lips firmly down on Hermione's. They entered a heated snog, stopping only to come up for air. Soon, their tongues had entered each other's mouths, their hands tangled in each other's hair. A good fifteen minutes had passed by until they stopped, hearing –

"Are those violins?" asked Ron, breaking away from Hermione.

"I think they are," she responded, equally puzzled. "I think it's coming from outside. Let's go see." She grabbed his arm, dragging him out of the Hospital Wing.

"What the bloody hell?" asked Ron dumbly.

"Is that _Malfoy_… wearing a Muggle tuxedo and… playing the violin?" asked Hermione uncertainly.

"Yeah, it is. My mum made me take violin, piano, and ballroom lessons when I was eight," said Malfoy, putting his violin down. "Besides, Potter's paying me. Pay up, Rich Saviour of the Wizarding World, you owe me fifty Galleons."

"Technically, Ginny should be paying you," Harry grumbled, reaching into his pocket. "She's the one who made the deal."

"Honestly, as long as I get my money, I don't really care, Potter," said Malfoy, pocketing fifty shiny Galleons with a wink.

"Oh yes you do, Mr. Malfoy," called a voice from the hallway behind them. All five turned to see a slim, golden-haired girl leaning against a wall. "You were practically crying when Ginny told you she was doing this for Ron and Hermione."

"Just because I couldn't imagine anybody falling in love with the Weasel. Or Granger either, for that matter," responded Malfoy defiantly.

"Sure, Draco, sure," she said, walking over. Her azure eyes were twinkling with mischief. She held out her hand to Hermione. "Hi, I'm Astoria. Astoria Greengrass."

"And we're dating, so stop looking at her like that, Weasel-bee," said Malfoy, slinging his arm around Astoria's shoulders protectively.

"You do remember that this whole violin thing was _for_ Ron and Hermione, right?" Astoria asked, pushing Malfoy's arms off her. "And I'm sure if Miss Pug-Face Parkinson walked down right now, you'd be all over her in a second, so don't give me all that crap about dating."

"Pansy?" asked Malfoy in disgust. "Did you ever see me _willingly_ with her? She just sucked up a lot, I never really cared about her."

"I'll take your word for it" Astoria responded, standing on her toes to give Malfoy a kiss.

"Bloody Merlin!" cried Harry. "Shield your eyes!"

"That's nothing compared to what Ron and Hermione were doing in there," said Ginny, grinning wickedly.

"You saw us?" asked Ron in horror.

"No, but I could hear the moans," Ginny responded.

"And you two, either stop snogging or find an empty room," Harry added to Draco and Astoria, who still hadn't broken apart.

"Our lives are so messed up," sighed Ginny.

"Honestly, somebody should write a few books on the crap we had to live through," said Harry.

"I wonder if our kids will have to go through stuff like this," wondered Ginny.

"Who cares?" asked Ron and Hermione simultaneously, bending over and restarting their unfinished snog session.

"Shall we, Mr. Potter?" asked Ginny, her eyes glinting.

"Of course, Miss Weasley," Harry answered mischievously, closing the distance between them.

"Merlin, that's nasty," said Draco, finally breaking away from Astoria.

"Oh, just shut up and kiss me."

"With pleasure."

_**Fin.**_

***

**Ta-daa! So, what do you guys think? Tell me in a review, please! Reviews make my day!**

**-Drishti Choudhury (teh moste awesome fanfiction writer eva! *well, in her opinion, that is*)**


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